Letting go of the need for approval
I was at a virtual funeral recently.
I did not know the woman who passed, but I am close to her daughter.
COVID meant that even the virtual turnout was small but size did not take away how powerful it was or the impact it had on me.
I did not know what she looked like other than one picture on the mantel. However, the picture in my mind from the description of the details of the life she led are etched in my mind.
I did not care if she wore beautiful clothes or followed the latest trends. If this mom wore lipstick everyday or coloured her hair. Did she drive a new car or take the bus? Did she go to college or university?
These things did not matter.
What I did learn was this woman loved her children more than anything. She loved her home, it was her safe place. She loved to dance. She was married 64 years to a man who loved her back. They knew what was important in life and shared great meals with grandchildren who all spoke at her funeral with such love and grace.
My eyes were teary throughout.
This woman left a legacy and taught the closest people in her life that all that finally matters is unconditional love.
I left the funeral wishing I had met her.
I do though feel grateful to have been there to reconfirm that her legacy is in her daughter and son and grandchildren.
I thank Norma who lived life on her own terms, who danced to her own song, who spent a lifetime loving and being true to her self.
It was her funeral I attended.
It is never too late to readjust our thinking or our view on things.
As I reflected I again wondered about why we care about what others think?
The answer may very well be the key to complete freedom to live our lives without regret.
When we don’t seek the approval of others we are at our most powerful.
Whether you call it approval or validation it doesn’t really matter.
I think we give our power away when we are overly concerned about what someone might think when in actual fact they are not thinking about us at all.
Eleanor Roosevelt, among others, said, “You would be surprised at how little people really think of you.”
A powerful thought.
I would love to pave the way to a place where the most important question is - Am I good with this?
If the answer is yes, then that is all we need. We do not need the approval of others.
As always, I wonder what your thoughts are. How do you approach letting go of relying upon the approval of others as you make life choices?
Love and gratitude