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When we say goodbye



How do you say goodbye?


If you had 24 hours left to live, who would you want to visit and what would you want to say?


This event just happened.


I was honoured to be allowed to say goodbye to a dear person in my life recently.

After suffering from Parkinson’s for 20 years, the pain is no longer tolerable.

We went to say our goodbyes.

What do you say to someone you shared life’s biggest moments with?

Pat was there for me when both my parents passed and I was there when she lost her sister and her both parents.


A common thread in our relationship was dealing with loss and finding the silver lining.


Until it was now her time.

What do I say?

I say the same things I would want her to say to me if it was my turn.

What she meant to me, what she added to my life and how much I was a better person for knowing her.


Pat did share that it meant everything to her to hear from the others in her life that she meant something and to hear it while she was alive.


The expression “don’t wait to tell someone you love them” was never so obvious.


The focus of her stare was intense and time was so precious.

Say what we must and then touch.

I rubbed her hand.

I held her hand.

I assured her she mattered to me and would not be forgotten.


When you don’t learn a lesson there is a fable that says; a little pebble is thrown, if you don’t pay attention the same lesson is told but a rock is thrown. If you’re still not listening, the rock will be a big old boulder. Until you learn the lesson it just keeps getting in your way.

My lesson, tell the ones you love, “I love you.”



You never ever know what the next 24 hours brings and nothing, nothing else matters but love.


To share it.

To give it.

To receive it.

When we started our cosmetic company 30 years ago it was with four people.

We all felt like family. Pat was one of the four. She was family.

Our first Christmas party was just us, but to get dinner reservations we needed six people to reserve a table. We invited my parents to make six of us.


They were simple times. And with reflection, probably the very best times.

When I had my last conversation with Pat and we recalled our fond memories that Christmas dinner was top on the list.

It’s not what we buy or get for each other, it’s the time we share with each other. Thank you Pat for reminding me.

Goodbye Pat, I will see you on the other side.



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This is so beautifully said.... I still pray and wish to have such Love one day. This is so inspiring

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Such important words Vita. This year a very good friend/client from TO whose health was failing called to say she had decided to end her life through Maid. What does one say when you hear that on the other end of a phone call. Silence at first and then strained words to actually articulate any kind of a conversation. Once I had steadied myself we shared good times, our families, our faith, prayers and our final goodbye. Tough saying goodbye to those we love.

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Vita Nachtsheim
Vita Nachtsheim
03 de fev. de 2023
Respondendo a

My heart is with you and I'm sorry you had to go through that. It is the time we share with those we love that matters most. That is the true gift of life.

Curtir

Beautifully written my Love... You never cease to inspire and encourage to reflect. ❤️ Tracy

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Vita Nachtsheim
Vita Nachtsheim
03 de fev. de 2023
Respondendo a

Thank you for the love and thoughtfulness. It means so much. It is healing to share and realize how much these experiences unite us together. ❤️

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katekerr40
katekerr40
01 de fev. de 2023

Wise words Vita...don't wait to tell someone how you feel, or that you love them - it's a hard lesson but one of the most important we can learn. Rest in peace Pat.

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Vita Nachtsheim
Vita Nachtsheim
03 de fev. de 2023
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❤️

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